My sweet Caylee, tomorrow is your birthday....... I dont know how Im going to get thru the day. My heart is broken as Kristen is holding services for your NICU buddy Kellen today. I wish I could be there. Please guide Kellen and help him get accustomed to his wings. I cannot believe it was one year ago I met you, you were the light of my life, sweet girl. I miss you soooooooo much! Please give me a sign tomorrow Bug! I love you!!!! 

My dear sweet Caylee, today was one of those days. I miss you so much it physically hurts. I took your brother to watch a movie and ended up crying the whole time!!! I went to a babies birthday party and cried 3 times. I dont usually do this, but Im soo lost and empty without you. While you were here I had a reason to get up and sit with you all day. I desperately miss those days. I saw that shooting star last night and know it was you saying hi Mommy. Please sweet baby know that I am missing you sooo much right now. I love you more than anything in this world. 

My sweet Caylee

My dearest Caylee, I am missing you more and more each day. People all say it gets better with time. I am sorry but they dont know what they are talking about! I am so excited to be working with March of Dimes in your memory, but dammit I wish you were here. I want to believe that this will get easier but I just dont. I know your here with me, I feel you around me, and I got your signs. Please guide me Bug, I want to do things the right way until its my time to come and be with you. Please every now and then kiss your brother, or tickle him, let him know you love him. He loves you soo much! Mommy misses you Caylee Marlisa and I will never stop loving you.